Missing Him

So today i am finding myself missing Bryce so much more than normal,

thinking on how life could of been with him here with us, having 4 kids at home instead of 3, wondering what he would be like, what he would look like, what words he would be saying etc, he would be almost 4 now,

 

Life isn’t fair at times, i still dont understand why he was taken from us, i know why i went into labor early for though i dont understand why it had to be us for or even why it had to happen at all honestly,

 

It isnt fair for a family to go through the death of a child, it doesnt matter the age of the child they could be still in the womb all the way up to 80+ years old, for a parent to have to bury their children is just wrong, its heart breaking and devastating,

 

I miss Bryce so much, i would do anything to hold him one more time, to tell him i love him one more time, or just to look at him and tell him that i am sorry,

 

I am sorry that my body could not hold you, Im sorry that my body rejected you, I am sorry that you had to be born before you was ready to be, or before you had a chance of survival,

 

I am really sorry honey, I love you so very much, And i am sure that you 2 younger brothers love you and your little sister loves you to,

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