Why…….

I find myself these days more worried for jade then ever…. I feel like i want to wrap her in cotton wool and NEVER let her out of my site,

 

I was doing some reading regarding jades conditions and yeah the thought that her thing in her brain could burst at any time and kill er with out any warning is very terrifying I know i cant watch her 24/7 i know i cant keep her from the world i know all i can do is give her as much love as i can and her the best in life

 

Though i have this part of me that is so hurting that it could happen an at the same time know that it could not happen i am very grateful that she has proven the doctors wrong on so many counts already, an my love for her is the same as i have for my boys, i dont ever want to part with them,

The thought of possibly loosing another child is utterly heart breaking (im not saying that we are definitely going to lose her) though there is a chance we could and its horrifying

 

 

Im sorry for this post i guess i just need to get it out, i guess i need a shoulder to cry on or someone here to tel me that its going to be alright,

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